The deepest loss.
It's still true. No other loss in my life has compared to that of losing my husband Brian when he was 32. Cancer is a cruel and painful disease.
Every year, I wonder and worry what this day will hold for me. Usually it's a need to keep myself busy and distracted.
Brian was a bright and shining light in my life. We felt so lucky to have one another and that was evident in our relationship. He was kind and fun, radiating joy. Even after his diagnosis, he focused on winning and always made the nurses and support staff smile and want to visit his room.
When I think of overcoming battles, it's his courage that I reflect upon and draw strength from. He amazed me with his resilience throughout that battle. Up until the last few hours of his life, when all the options were gone, he was determined to survive.
I wish you could have known him. That's what I miss most; because he was a great person, he was kind, and he was funny. He made friends wherever he went. I know if you had met him, you would leave that meeting with a smile on your face.
So today, on his 42nd birthday, I hope you'll share a smile and a kind and uplifting word. With your family, coworkers, friends, a stranger.
Keep it Brian.
