the goddess of grief

Original date 25 March 2011

Grief is one of the most powerful Goddesses.  She swallows your agony and lets it tear her apart.  Beautiful birds fly from her belly-each one an insight into life and your power.  Grief brings the whole flock to your window and she waits and waits to reveal universal truths to you.  She goes to depths with you.  She rises with you.

Grief won't rest until you swallow the medicine she made especially for you.

How to absorb the medicine of grief:

1.Grief messes with your focus.  When she's tap-tapping on the door of your consciousness, it becomes difficult to concentrate.  You're not sure what your priorities are, not sure where to put your attention, and when you do put it somewhere,it slips off easily.  Times does not feel fresh...it feels a bit stale.  Launching new things feels awkward, and subtly inappropriate.

Remedy:Give yourself time to meander, aimlessly.  Aim less.  Under achieve.  Be confused.  You are giving birth to a new reality...it takes tremendous resources.  Healing hurts before you feel right again.

2.Grief is patient.  Grief may operate on a time-release capsule system.  She'll let you be busy and distracted for a period of time before she descends.  She respects survival mechanisms and the necessities.

Remedy:Throw yourself into work or hobbies.

3.Denying grief her power squelches your vitality.  You can dream and laugh and march on, but until you swallow the bitter tea that grief has brewed, things won't be as vibrant or grounded as they could be.  And that's half dead.

Remedy:Recognize that you are numb.  Notice memories that "ouch" the most.  This is the beginning of response-ability.

4.Grief crystallizes in your body.  The medicine will get stuck in your muscle memory and joints.  It needs to circulate and be digested.

Remedy:You have to dance grief to the surface. Stomp.  Rock.  Stretch.  Move without your intellect getting in the way.  Keep moving.

5. Grief thinks scars make for great tattoos.

Remedy:Accept that you will never be the same.  Trauma marks you.
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There is a sacredness to tears.  They are not the mark of weakness, but of power.  They speak  more eloquently than ten thousand tongues.  They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.