not the future Mrs. Someone Else

Original date 19 April 2011

I'm ready to move on.   At last I can see life has been patiently waiting for me.

However, I'm not looking to date, or "see" anyone, and I'm definitely not looking to become a future Mrs. "Someone Else."  Not anytime soon, anyway.  I'd like to just be me again, and re-learn how to live and be happy.

I never thought I'd get married the first time.  I guess that's what I get for thinking.
I do miss Brian...who he was and what we had together.  I will always miss him.  I miss him less everyday.  I find that there are stretches of days where I don't think about him. 

On the flip side, I find I think of him all the time, in every situation.  I find myself saying, "Oh, Brian did..." or "Brian would have..." or "Brian had..."  I'm making a conscious effort to not do that anymore.

People don't care about that any longer...what he had or did or would have thought.  I'm finding that I no longer need to think about what he had or did or would have thought.  It's not that I don't care...it's I don't need that anymore.  I don't need those thoughts or feelings anymore.  I'm ok without them.

I'm ok without him.